Assassination Vacation

displaying an almost childlike faith in the competence, honesty, and efficacy of the federal bureacracy insofar as that bureacracy is tasked with dishing out lethal force that they would never in a million years ascribe to, say, the people in charge of the Endangered Species Act.

Devastating.

There is some speculation that some assassinations have already taken place, particularly the suspicious death of Ardeshir Hosseinpour, an Iranian nuclear scientist.

Best comment on Insty I saw was at Henley's site: Ironic that Glenn is advocating the assassination of Iranian versions of himself.

Just to be crystal clear, Stratfor is of the opinion that "Hassanpour was in fact a Mossad target." Thus it may be more realistic that Mossad, as opposed to the CIA, is one to conduct a program of decapitation. Stratfor continued:

"Decapitating a hostile nuclear program by taking out key human assets is a tactic that has proven its effectiveness over the years, particularly in the case of Iraq. In the months leading up to the 1981 Israeli airstrike on Iraq's Osirak reactor -- which was believed to be on the verge of producing plutonium for a weapons program -- at least three Iraqi nuclear scientists died under mysterious circumstances." (source subscription required)

"Are there really dozens of Farsi-speaking ninjas working for the CIA?"

Ha! Am I the only one that was disproportionally amused by that line?

Because if 10-15 Iranian nuclear scientists drop dead Iran will have no idea who did it.

Farsi-speaking ninjas

We actually did have an elite unit of Farsi-speaking ninjas, but they were outed. And then fired.

Why does Matthew think we need "dozens" of ninjas? One or two should do it, no?

Also, I would think that the "bureaucracy" wouldn't be that much of an impediment - the sign-offs for an assassination would seem to me to be pretty different than a critical habitat designation.

Are there really dozens of Farsi-speaking ninjas working for the CIA?

I dunno, but it's too bad Golan/Globus isn't in business any more; the screenplay practically writes itself!

Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Well, they did take out Paul Wellstone. Kidding.

Wingnut logic is based on the program "24." Since Jack Bauer does it, it must be true.

Glenn's pretty sure that Chuck Norris speaks Farsi. Problem solved.

I think you nailed it with childlike. These people are children. They indulge in the vicious fantasies of adolescents with no a drop of adult wisdom, pragmatism or empathy. They view life as a big eighties action flick, with no sense of irony or self-awareness.

Thus it may be more realistic that Mossad, as opposed to the CIA, is one to conduct a program of decapitation. - Ben

Excellent. That way if things go wrong we can always blame the Jews, eh?

And some of my fellow members of the tribe think that it's a good thing that Bush & CO is willing to let Mossad get away with stuff and how they "support Israel"? What part of the word "tool" do they not understand? Of course, they are so busy thinking the Christian Zionists are tools and also being paranoid about left wing anti-Zionism they don't realize that they are the real tools for a foreign policy that is, in the long run, very bad for Israel ... but, for all their militant Zionism, these chickenhawks aren't making aliyah any time soon, so what do they care?

It's true. Jonah Goldberg has pretty much admitted he's animated by trash like "Red Dawn." I want the grownups back in charge.

Also, regarding the wisdom of decapitation (in the context of Iraq):

Next up, several members decide to demand that if we use air strikes against Iraq, we take out Saddam Hussein. In the first place, murdering foreign leaders is not a proper tool of foreign policy, for the sensible reason that you never know what you'll get if you do. One of the most famous hypothetical questions of history is: What if someone had managed to murder Adolf Hitler early on? Suppose someone did, and then the Nazi movement had been taken over by, say, Albert Speer, who was a lot better organized than Hitler? - Molly Ivins, February 11, 1998

"American agents are infiltrating Iran killing Iranian scientists and religious leaders and none of them get caught. How?"

It's called acting.

DurkaDurkaDurkaMohammedMohammed

Because if 10-15 Iranian nuclear scientists drop dead Iran will have no idea who did it.

Of course they'd know who did it. It's just that in wingnut fantasyland, they would instantly be cowed in subservience. The same way that, for example, by showing that we were willing to kick ass in Iraq we deterred all the other Middle Eastern nations from dabbling in WMD.

Why does Matthew think we need "dozens" of ninjas? One or two should do it, no?

Al again claims the self-parody award for the eleventy-billionth straight day.

One need look no further than the "decapitation" attempts made pre-invasion against Hussein and Sons for an active US policy. One reason Hussein refused the "inspectors" admittance to his palaces. And then there were also the attempts on Osama and Khadaffi and Castro. There have been many many US attempts, failures and successes, on the lives of heads of state. Why would we believe that civilian and military figures have been or would be immune?

Al is apparently not acquainted with the military term "redundancy". Never saw Crimson Tide, I guess.

We actually did have an elite unit of Farsi-speaking ninjas, but they were outed. And then fired.

Somehow, the mental image of a crack team of dozens of gay, lesbian and transgender Farsi ninjas just makes everything else about this suggestion OK.

If they did exist, I'm pretty sure I'd cheer for them no matter what they did. Sort of like Queer Eye for the Straight Guy meets American Ninja.

I mean, can you imagine the drama a bunch of combat-trained queens turning up to a mission to knock off a mullah only to realise they're all wearing the same outfit?

What Mike Nilsen said.

displaying an almost childlike faith

They let children watch '24'?
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Hopefully this is not too insty, but I believe that a targetted goal of removing Saddam Hussein from power using up to the force we did use, would have been preferrable to what we got.
And following that logic, that it would be in everyone's interest to create a robust international organization that could sanction that for truly bad regimes like Husseins. Not that this is a good solution, just that it would have been preferable.
Obviously, this would have nothing to do with quiet.

"I mean, how is this going to work?"

It won't.

This has been another version of 'simple answers...'

Seriously, you have it dead on, as do a lot of your commenters. GR and HH's worlds are filled with film fantasies of supermen spies and assassins. And even if they don't believe in these farsiphone ninja paladin hashhashin, their readership does.

Chuck Norris could do it, and he would work for free.

I mean, how is this going to work? We're talking, presumably, about the clandestine branches of the same intelligence agencies who can't decide what the state of the Iranian nuclear program is

And what happens to agents who can't find or kill these targets? Will they be required to pretend, as with the wmd "threat," that they have done so? Will they have to stalk imaginary targets or post fictitious kills in order to keep their Death Squad jobs?
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Farsi-speaking ninjas!

bwahahahahaha!!!

Go back a week or two, and you'll see Glenn Reynolds wondering about Putin's "thuggishness" and asking why no one is putting up a fuss over the Litvenko poisoning case.

Glenn is advocating the assassination of Iranian versions of himself.

Well, after four years, it would be nice if all the other rightwing bloggers would take a break from calling for the murder of their Arab equivalents and take a hint from Reynolds to advocate the butchery of their Persian counterparts instead.

Later, they can call for the deaths of their Chinese or North Korean equivalents and then, if things go very very badly, their Pakistani counterparts.

In fact, let's cut to the chase by putting all the world's far-right vicariously homicidal wussies in one big room with a lot of nuclear-powered vibrators with like razors and shit on them and leave them all in there until the screaming stops.

Or is that a "big government solution"?
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Patrick Swayze from Red Dawn could do it. Or maybe we could get the entire cast of the Outsiders back together. Those guys were tough (although sensitive in a manly way when necessary to get chicks).

I suppose to be safe, we should send Chuck Norris from Delta Force. Although, I think the best bet would be Fred Ward's Remo Williams http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089901/. I'm still waiting for the sequel. This could be it.

Who am I missing?

One again proof that Conservatives confuse "most" powerful with "all" powerful.

If the hotel records from Italy are any guide, we taxpayers are already putting up our "exfiltrators" and "renditioners" moviestar-like upkeep.

At least the moviestars or, uh, rockstars? (ugh) would get it done right. Right?

Right.

Who am I missing?

Well, the entire cast of Megaforce, for one thing.
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This "childlike faith" in unaccountable agencies of the US government "quietly" using assassination, plus the campaign blogging flap, plus the Howard "external leader intervening in US campaigns" non-flap, etc. have crystallized a realization.

The Us vs. Them mentality displayed by these ideologues isn't just a quirk or a rhetorical pose. They basically have split personalities -- one invoked when they deal with "good guys" (whomever those are defined to be at the moment) and one for dealing with "bad guys" (ditto). These personalities have completely different moral standards, world views, historical memories, and maybe even verbal styles (e.g. "civility"). Neither is really aware of the other.

Even apparently cynical positions (Its OK If You're A Republican) may just be symptoms of this multiple personality disorder. The Us personality doesn't remember (in fact was never aware of) the vociferous condemnations issued by the Them personality, and finds similar condemnations of Us completely bizarre.

Possibly there is some way to get these separate worldviews to confront each other, resulting in a breakdown, and the formation of a better, more unified human being. Maybe David Brock could provide some clues about this. But of course the prospect of such a confrontation provokes extreme anxiety, so any means at all is justified to "kill off" the threat...

Wow. That should work beautifully! The former CIA-puppet Shah of Iran worked out great too, until he was overthrown by...who was he overthrown by again?

Oh yeah: militant Islamic revolutionaries. I guess the Shah must've outlived his ninjas.

Simple, really. Just poison them with polonium 210 and blame it on Putin.

These guys really do prove that banality and evil go together very well.

Good call on Megaforce but I'm not sure that's realistic.

Didn't "Face" from A-Team speak Farsi?

I think what he has in mind is to use our death ray satellites to explode their heads with directed energy beams.

I think we should get Ted Shackley back in business, with Howard Hunt, get some Iranian exiles training in camps in Florida, and maybe someone could talk to the Chicago Outfit guys about playing a part. No one will be sure who the shooters are, mob, right wing Iranian refugees, or rogue CIA.

Or, we could follow the Russian's lead and leave a radiation trail right back to our door.

The entire overt and covert resources of the US were devoted to killing Hussein preinvasion. It did not work.
We had Arabic speaking CIA ninjas in Bagdad and they only came up with a lot of bad leads. Have we forgotten the civilians killed in cafe bombings where Hussein and kin were not? Those big bomb craters in residential streets? Raids on chicken ranches?
It is obvious that BushCheney need to employ the 24 crew if they expect any real degree of success.

"I think what he has in mind is to use our death ray satellites to explode their heads with directed energy beams."

Ah, yes, the Real Genius Val Kilmer solution. Subtle and deadly. I like it. But can we really count on a bureaucratic agency like Nasa to get the Death Ray Satellite launched in time. Maybe we can get Peter Graves to do it from Mission Impossible (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060009/maindetails).

In all this talk I think we are missing the potential of veiled women in this scheme. We could send Mrs King (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085088/maindetails).

All Jack Bauer needs is a satchel full of gear and THE VOICE, and the Iranian nuclear program, which is the most dangerous thing ever to face the earth (at least 24.4 million times more dangerous than the Soviet Union's nukes), will disappear in a matter of 3 episodes.

Skinner: Well, I was wrong. The lizards are a godsend.
Lisa: But isn't that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we're overrun by lizards?
Skinner: No problem. We simply release wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They'll wipe out the lizards.
Lisa: But aren't the snakes even worse?
Skinner: Yes, but we're prepared for that. We've lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat.
Lisa: But then we're stuck with gorillas!
Skinner: No, that's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.

Ah pidy da fo!

Let's get Jennifer Garner! She'll wear a slinky dress and a wig, talk with a funny accent, go to a glamorous party that just happens to be right next to the uranium enhancement facility in Teheran, kickbox the shit out of some faceless guards, and then blow those mullahs and scientists all to hell.

That's the trouble with us leftists, we just don't know how to have any fun! Man, this stuff is sexy! See, that's why everyone knew that Valerie Plame Wilson was a spy; she's a babe, so you can tell.

Try again with working links.

"I think what he has in mind is to use our death ray satellites to explode their heads with directed energy beams."

Ah, yes, the Real Genius Val Kilmer solution. Subtle and deadly. I like it. But can we really count on a bureaucratic agency like Nasa to get the Death Ray Satellite launched in time. Maybe we can get Peter Graves to do it from Mission Impossible http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060009/maindetails.

In all this talk I think we are missing the potential of veiled women in this scheme. We could send Mrs King http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085088/maindetails.

No, no, the Iranians will never figure out our cunning plan, because they're all, like, brown-skinned and stuff. Lemme get my copy of "The Bell Curve" out...it's right here somewhere...

Christ. Somebody call up Doug Feith and let him know that Glann is catching up.

I don't know what the big deal is.

What with the presidential signing statements already in place, this just lets people know that radical mullahs and Iranian atomic scientists are on equal footing with American citizens.

Chuck Norris could do it, and he would work for free.

But we can't let them watch Norris in action, because the U.S. has now disavowed torture.

This is no surprise, as conservatives view the world as if it were as simple as a cartoon. They have no grasp of the complexities and nuances that one has to understand to really implement thoughtful policy, international or domestic.

The world is not an episode of 24. Problems will not be solved by the end of the hour, and there are no magic bullets.

Glenn Reynolds is objectively pro-terrorism.

If Joss Whedon weren't such a stinking liberal, Buffy and Willow could not only take out the nuclear program, but also force the demons to leave the Iranians' bodies.

Well, Matt, that's because these stupid shits base their worldview on Tom Clancy and 24.

Can one remind me why is it wrong (at least, for s_o_m_e countries) to support terrorism? I missed the chapter on moral superiority of assassins over terrorists in my ethics class.

Another aspect of this "solution" is that assassination is not a particularly high tech occupation, and if we send assassins to other countries on regular basis, we can get likewise guests. And assassin is a very different beast than terrorist. For starters, a government can recruit and train on a much higher level than a terrorist organization, and it has easy access to much more lethal hardware. Suppose that Capitol will be strifed with missiles exactly at the time of State Union Address -- voila! decapitation.

The key thing to remember with neocons like Reynolds is that they quite literally live in a fantasy world. When he says "we should be responding quietly, killing radical mullahs and Iranian atomic scientists," he means he wishes we could do those things. It is no more or less complicated than that.

It's true that certain conservatives take Instapundit seriously. And I know Reynolds itself would describe his political philosophy as something more than "stern and serious wishing." But when you closely examine the thinking of him and other neoconservatives, their thinking truly is pure fantasy. Matt has it exactly right: it is childlike. Except these precocious little children have figured out how to pretend their stern and serious wishes are real ideas.

It's sort of like the neocon wish that invading Iraq would democratize the Middle East. They had no facts to back it up. No real understanding of the region. No evidence to suggest they were right. They just really, really, really wished it would happen in a very stern and serious way.

Tom Friedman does it all the time. Just last week he was saying America must institute a hefty gas tax to solve the war in Iraq. Now, anyone with half a brain knows this will never, ever happen in the current political climate. Even Friedman knows it on some level. But he's been substituting wishing for actual thinking for so long now, he no longer knows the difference.

Ok, this mission is a go. Norris, Schwartzenneggar, and Garner will parachute into Tehran with the ninjas. Project Runway will coordinate. Jack Bauer will commandeer a helicopter in the Green Zone with Mr. T and Doug Feith...

This almost writes itself.

I'm sure I'm not the first to point this out, but the Red State right's obsession with "Red Dawn" is especially crazy these days. I mean, the plot is a dead ringer for current events--foreign coalition forces invade and take over homeland, depose and kill its leaders, install a puppet government charged with imposing an alien ideology, and indigenous insurgents rise up to oppose the international coalition using improvised weaponry and guerilla tactics--and the Red State right is rooting AGAINST the Wolverines.

Are these guys incapable of even the slightest bit of self-reflection?

As many on the patriotic blogosphere pointed out in 2004, when Dan Rather was outed as an Islamofascist supporter, our President - or as Larry Kudlow likes to call him, President Backbone - back in the Vietnam days dropped out and pretended to go awol while he worked on super secret missions for the CIA in North Vietnam. He, personally, killed many of those vicious, torturing communists with his bare hands, and was just a hair away from assasinating Giap himself and ending the war in total victory for democracy when his program was blown by the Traitorous New York Times. As is well known, Rambo 2 is based on George Bush's life. So - Instapundit is right.

We have the man in office who has the skills and power to bring down those murderous mullahs. My plan is this: President Backbone himself is parachuted into highly dangerous Iranian territory. The vast mass of the Iranian population, groaning under the tyranny of the evil axis, will of course help him as he makes his way to Teheran and that thrilling conclusion of perhaps the greatest presidency ever wished upon this country by God Almighty, throttling the genocidal Ahminadejad, blowing up the Supreme leader's torture palace, and escaping the combined forces of the Revolutionary army.
It will be so cool, too, if he can film it for YouTube.

More and more I'm finding that a simple way to define a Conservative is someone who thinks that pulp spy fiction (Tom Clancy, Len Deighton, James Bond, 24 etc) are the real world.

I can't believe you all have reached 60 posts on this without mentioning 'The Unit'. It just shows how disconnected liberals are from American culture.

Buffy and Willow could not only take out the nuclear program, but also force the demons to leave the Iranians' bodies.

Yes, but the lesbians would scare American forces out of Iraq, leaving Anya to rule the whole country with her cash register and an iron fist.
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"Can one remind me why is it wrong (at least, for s_o_m_e countries) to support terrorism? I missed the chapter on moral superiority of assassins over terrorists in my ethics class."

Seriously? You don't see targeting civilians as worse than targeting political figures?

and i can't believe we've gotten 60 posts into this thread without anyone mentioning that, since frank church was a dirty stinkin' hippie and his 1975 (iirc) committee investigation of the sorry tale of CIA assassinations clearly the work of objectively pro-terrorists leftists, it's critical that we overturn everything that he did.

the amazing thing, really, is how long in advance the fifth column of church's committee was planning ahead to aid the terrorists, but prof instanitwit his finally sussed that out.

Savage (Michael Wiener) could do it. You dress him up like one of them Rabbis who hugged Ahmadinijead, strap a payload in his money belt and BOOM! "What a way to go out!" you tell him, and you never know with him- he just might go for it. Just load him up with his kid's booster beverage (*Rockstar)and he's good to go.

the TMNT could do it

wait, we've totally forgotten about schwarzenegger!! he could go to iran on a diplomatic mission, and then start with the assassinations, achieving some sort of governator/terminator convergence. maybe we could get him to take stallone (ahem, rambo) along too.

and i can't believe we've gotten 60 posts into this thread without anyone mentioning that, since frank church was a dirty stinkin' hippie and his 1975 (iirc) committee investigation of the sorry tale of CIA assassinations clearly the work of objectively pro-terrorists leftists, it's critical that we overturn everything that he did.

In truth, howard, I was going to post snarkily that, yeah, our covert-assassination-ops program worked out sooooooooo well in the '60s, but I decided to go with the screenplay crack instead.

Your reference to the Church Committee was spot-on, though. And in that vein, and with a nod to the CIA-did-it school of Kennnedy assassination conspiracy theorists, let's also not forget that Reynolds pretends that there'd never, ever, ever be blowback, even from our own team of crack Farsi-speaking ninjas.

Because, you know, there wasn't any blowback from our ops in Afghanisatan.

In case it hasn't been said: Let's parachute Glenn and Hugh into the center of Tehran in full SWAT gear to undertake this mission that they are so adamant about being done!

Y'know, if I'm an American atomic scientist, or if I'm involved with developing American military technology, I read this jingoistic nonsense with a bit of trepidation. Because if we DID start targeting Iranian scientists, would there not be the potential for some tit-for-tat?

I would think it would be a bit easier for Iran to infiltrate the US than the other way around, and many of our scientists presumably live relatively normal lives--i.e. they live in the suburbs, not in fortified military compounds. So we hear all this moronic macho posturing about "taking out" Iranian scientists, not so much about how that might put our own people at risk. Not that Reynolds or Hewitt have every shown much concern when other's lives are put in jeopardy.

Sounds like a job for the 1st Battalion, Transvestite Brigade (Airborne Wing).

Well, they did take out Paul Wellstone. Kidding.

No, you weren't.

>if you somehow did build a hyper-competent utterly secret government agency it would likely become a cesspool of corruption and abuses of power.

We have the second now, when will get the first?

People are forgetting that we have battalions of supersmart golden retrievers. The mullahs don't stand a chance.

I do not feel a childlike sense of comfort in the certainty that these assination squads already exist, but they do not do entertainment.

We have the second now, when we will get the first?

I hate typos.

Good post.

Y'know, if I'm an American atomic scientist, or if I'm involved with developing American military technology, I read this jingoistic nonsense with a bit of trepidation. Because if we DID start targeting Iranian scientists, would there not be the potential for some tit-for-tat? - Mean Gene

If Insty ever gets a job blogging for a GOP candidate, we oughta force him to resign over these remarks. After all, if Ms. Marcotte is to be called anti-Catholic, Insty certainly hates science and scientists.

If Insty ever gets a job blogging for a GOP candidate

To paraphrase John Simon, why pay for what you're already getting for free?

Knowing Bush, he'll fuck it up and kill Salman Rushdie.

"I want the grownups back in charge."

I don't think the adults were ever in charge...look at the past 100 years.

Being old enough to remember the Church Committee, Reynolds' idea is risible but that doesn't mean that it's completely without merit: it occasioned the funniest comment thread I've read in a long time.

Man, "Farsi speaking ninjas" and now "tit-for-tat"- I always show up after all the good stuff happens.

I say we try the old poison cigar trick again. It might work a little better if we're not trying it on the leader of the country that makes the best cigars in the world.

But if we really want to pound them into rubble, we should just offer some Halliburton contracts. That would put their nuclear program back about a decade.

This thread seems childishly niave and a bit of a self-parody.

Fact is U.S. black-op assasinations are not so extrodinary. Happened many times. Been doing it in Iraq. Generally we hire locals (criminals) for the job.

Reynolds and his readers live in D&D land, where a Level 50 Mage with a Cloak of Invisibility and an Amulet of Many Tongues can infiltrate Iran and cast "Golum's Magic Sword" to kill Iranian scientists. When they return from their Noble Adventure, their chronicles by the Bards of the Blogosphere and who will be well rewarded by Elven Nymphs from the Land of Malkin.

The roleplaying would be funny from a distance, if it didn't involve so many tragedies like this http://www.worldpressphoto.com/index.php?option=com_photogallery&task=view&id=875&Itemid=146&bandwidth=high]?rss

*crackle*
Snake, have you inflitrated iran yet?
Snake?
SNAKUUUuuuuU!
*crackle*

"This thread seems childishly niave and a bit of a self-parody.

Fact is U.S. black-op assasinations are not so extrodinary. Happened many times. Been doing it in Iraq. Generally we hire locals (criminals) for the job."

You better watch it Yehuda or we'll send Jack Bauer after you.

The blogger and the commenters thereafter are playing in the realm of an autistic fantasy land, where apparently we can afford to deal with problems like a nuclear-armed Iran by rocking in the fetal position and cooing repeatedly: Go 'way, go 'way...

Not to put too fine a point on it, but you people are freaks, developmental failures. Killing those constructing the devices that would destroy American cities seems like a measured and reserved precautionary measure, given the magnitude of the risk this country is facing.

If you disagree, WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE?

Among regular human beings, blinking out external reality, looking in the mirror and indulging spasms of pseudo-moral vanity isn't an option.

TheCoach writes "And following that logic, that it would be in everyone's interest to create a robust international organization that could sanction that for truly bad regimes like Husseins. Not that this is a good solution, just that it would have been preferable."

Your problem is that if such a robust international organization existed, its Ten Most Wanted would probably start with little Donnie Rumsfeld and Paul Wolfowitz.

George Bush might not make the list: who can take him seriously? He doesn't have the prerequisite competence for your average normal malefactor.

Fact is U.S. black-op assasinations are not so extrodinary. Happened many times. Been doing it in Iraq. Generally we hire locals (criminals) for the job.

How "black" are our black-ops if random commentors on the Internet receive briefings on them?

The fact is, I have no problem believing it's easy to get people killed once you've already invaded a country and the situation is chaos.

I have a considerably harder time believing we can just sneak James Bond into a foreign country and assassinate their leader. Lord knows we clumsily shot at Saddam and missed him enough times.

Killing those constructing the devices that would destroy American cities seems like a measured and reserved precautionary measure, given the magnitude of the risk this country is facing.

You are completely insane. No state is going to nuke the U.S.

Ted Nugent is working on his farsi right now.

Wow, I agree with Reynolds and Hewitt for a change!

I think the quiet little assassination of individuals is a wonderfully minimalist way of conducting warfare. Too bad we couldn't have just shot Saddam or Bin Laden and walked away from the Middle East. It's much more humane than "smart"-bombing the crap out whole countries on the theory that all Arabs and Muslims are villains.

As for the practicality of it, well, that's another issue entirely. But the idea, in principle, gets my vote. If you're going to get blood on your hands, better to do it that way.

(By the way, is there anybody else that thought Yassir Arafat didn't just "get sick?")

Again, how is the US putting secret cells of ninja assassins into Iran to kill important national figures different from Al Qaeda doing the same thing here ?

Oh. That's right. They're evil killers who have no have no respect for the rule of law or human life.

Corrected my own typo.

As for the practicality of it, well, that's another issue entirely.

I hear the travelling faster than the speed of light and human immortality have also had similar pesky little bugs.

though the CIA has often it seems not done the job they were meant to do, I would leave it to them rather than the nutters, the gun-toting "libertarianms" with tenure at law schools to do what needs to be done. Why is it that these would-b e cowboys alwayhs egg on others to do the "taking oput," and they themselves somehow spend all their time blogging or teaching and never actually do any of the stuff they so advocate? Offer to do it! Talk is cheap. Act now.

So aside from all the action flick talk. These are the people who advocate a small government, and have conservative values? They trust the government (the gov'mnt that all through the Clinton years could not be trusted) to go into Iran and execute the bad guys? No trial, no jury, just shoot 'em down in cold blood because they are believed to be bad guys. WTF? These people are really scary.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but you people are freaks, developmental failures. Killing those constructing the devices that would destroy American cities seems like a measured and reserved precautionary measure, given the magnitude of the risk this country is facing.

1)There's no reason to believe that, even if they acquired nuclear weapons, Iranian leaders would commit national suicide by using them against the U.S.

2)There is no reason to believe that a few assassinations would actually stop Iran from acquiring nukes--indeed, being threatened by the U.S. would simply solidify the most hardline political elements and make it impossible for the U.S. to secure necessary cooperation from countries that could help Iran.

3)Moreover, because of Iraq we've sent a signal that we may invade a country irrespective of whether they have any significant weapons capacity, so some saber-rattling won't convince Iran to give up.

4)And, finally, only the most abject moron would believe that we could just start killing major figures in Iran "quietly."

Engaging in completely counterproductive strategies just to feel the need to "do something!!!!ONE!11111!" against a vastly exaggerated threat is not an argument for grownups. Worse, it's what produced the Iraq fiasco, which has significantly strengthened the Iranian state you're pissing your pants about.

how is it republican cultists such as reynolds and his ilk don't know they are stoopid as sin.
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Brian, I couldn't agree with you more. Finally, some common sense. You are just the guy who would recognise the value in having a fallout shelter for when the time comes, and I am just the guy willing to sell you the works - it comes with a self-help judo protection book, too (with helpful illustrations), plus a laetrile supplement guaranteed to get you through the gamma ray phase of the inevitable Iranian takeover.

Oh yes, they are laughing at the patriots who come up with the only decent plan to defuse the Iranians on the sly, until we can persuade the U.N. to make that a see through country - Purex if you know what I mean. But by then the suitcases in the hands of the Hezbollah terrorists, posing as Arabic studies Professors, will have already blown up the major cities. Plus you must have noticed the Democrats in congress. Throw in your gay agenda in the press, and it is time to think like a Man about protecting you and the ones you love - the obedient woman and the homeschooled five adorable kids.

The whole fallout shelter kit is such a steal for a sweat 60 thou that it is almost too good to be true, and your thinking, are those asbestos blocks hollow? I can see you have an eagle eye - I bet you have had plenty of training on some advanced computer war games. The reason for the cheapness is pure patriotism. A love of country, rare these days. In these troubled times, as probably the best president we've ever had is literally crucified by defeatism and they teach kids abortionism, pacificism, and flag burning instead of the ABCs, you know you should go for it. Don't be a freak - be a freedom fighter!

Wow, a veritable symphony of offended masculinity in response... I guess calling them movie-geek fantasists is the best way to flush them out, assuming, of course, that one wants to do such a thing.

If they did exist, I'm pretty sure I'd cheer for them no matter what they did. Sort of like Queer Eye for the Straight Guy meets American Ninja.

I'd watch that if Howard Dean is in it.

We actually did have an elite unit of Farsi-speaking ninjas, but they were outed. And then fired.

Curse this new openness! Fifty years ago we would have blackmailed them into being absolutely loyal by threatening to expose their homosexuality. Now we have to fire them!

-fred

If only we had ninja pirates, these problems would all be immediately resolved and Reynolds instantly redeemed.

Interesting report from CNN this morning. Of course, there’s no chance whatsoever that the U.S. was in any way involved in this. It just a coincidence that the U.S. seeks regime change in Iran. The thought is pure James Bond ninja nonsense. Ahem, right? … Right?

CNN.com

"Bomb kills 11 on military bus in Iran"

"A car bomb ripped through an Iranian military bus in the southeastern Iranian border town of Zahedan Wednesday morning, leaving at least 11 dead and 31 wounded…

"…the car blew up as soon as the bus, which belonged to the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps, arrived to pick up military personnel at a barracks.
Two motorcycle riders reportedly fired shots at the bus, forcing it to stop near the car bomb when it was then detonated by remote control…
…four people in a car cut off the bus … then sped away on two motorcycles -- later detonating the explosives by remote control...."

In an effort to remain dispassionate I stated above that "the U.S. seeks regime change in Iran." Perhaps, to make my comment more accurate, I should add "...and is on the verge of war with Iran."

DISCAIMER: This supplemental language should in no way be construed to suggest U.S. involvement in the above cited incident, nor should it be inferred that the U.S. proximity to war with Iran increases the likelihood of such U.S. involvement.

""Why does Matthew think we need "dozens" of ninjas? One or two should do it, no?""

Yes, I too found this a troubling remark. It shows disrespect for our ninjas and their abilities to suggest that so many would be required.

Why couldn't he just support the ninjas by keeping his opinions, slander and cheap shots to himself.

""Excellent. That way if things go wrong we can always blame the Jews, eh?""

Well the Stratfor opinion isn't unique and makes a lot more sense than US involvement.

If there were however a reason to have the Mossad carry out such a thing rather than the CIA it would be less about Israelis being blamed than the fact they would be less likely to screw it up in the first place.

You can read what CIA officers ordered for room service in Italian court records along with every movement they made in the country prior, during and after the kidnapping they carried out in Milan.

Perhaps Reynolds had Jewish Farsi speaking ninjas in mind.

There seems to be a lot of skepticism in this thread about whether the U.S. would, could or should be involved in covert assassinations and other such black ops stuff.

I don’t see why. I’m certainly not advocating it, indeed it seems reprehensible to me -- the root of much evil and certain blowback.

But I don’t doubt we do it for a second though. If forced to bet, I would put my money on that we do, have and will.

Are there reasons I don't see to think otherwise?

Insty just wants to encourage Iranian tit-for-tat attacks on American climate scientists.

Perhaps Reynolds had Jewish Farsi speaking ninjas in mind.

Gay Jewish Persian-speaking ninjas based in eastern Tennessee. Call Jimbob Ghadir Peretz, stat.

Perhaps Glenn just wants to use the same group of "black ninjas" that Clinton proposed using to go after al Qaeda in Afghanistan. Clinton believed--correctly!--that if al Qaeda saw a bunch of our "black ninjas" "rappel[ing] out of helicopters in to the middle of their camp" it "would scare the shit out of" them.

Now that's sophistication!

Unfortunately the Pentagon never implemented the plan, and we've been stuck with the aftermath since then.

They never implemented it because they couldn't find any who were sufficiently clean and articulate.

If we get in a tit-for-tat assassination war with Iran, I can guarantee you there are going to be a LOT of dead American diplomats and/or CIA station chiefs scattered across the Middle East, if not the world. The Cheney Administration may be crazy, but it's not THAT crazy.

Only Glenn Reynolds and Hugh Hewitt could make George W. Bush and Dick Cheney look like sober, responsible leaders.

I've wondered for a while why people find Glenn Reynolds compelling as a writer, thinker, blogger, pundit. I mean so many other bloggers seems to suck up to him and put him on their blogroll. His book was stupid and he's an idiot, no better than a Dobson or a Farwell. This matcho, tv-land assasination crap only proves it.

awesome post Matt.

Didn't see the original post, but did it acknowledge that we don't have such a great record, when it comes to this kind of intereference, specifically in Iran? The CIA orchestrated the coup of Prime Minister Mossadegh in the 1950s and the subsequent consolidation of power by the Shah. Didn't end well -- in fact, there's kind of a straight line between the downfall of Mossadegh and the crappy situation today. So, in addition to your feasibility question, Matt, there's a basic question of efficacy.

More and more I'm finding that a simple way to define a Conservative is someone who thinks that pulp spy fiction (Tom Clancy, Len Deighton, James Bond, 24 etc) are the real world.

The bottled water issue is not going away. I am from the small town of McCloud in far northern california. Nestle, one of the largest multi-nationals on the planet is attempting to hijack our community water supply to enhance their own bottom line.
The bottled water industry has done a phenomenal marketing job. They have convinced the gullible masses that it is better to pay exorbiant rates for a public resource that is available to the masses at a fraction of the cost (both environmental and in dollars). This discussion focuses on Fiji brand. The much larger issue is the bottled water industry itself. Are we, as a society, going to let a life-sustaining, public resource become commodified by a handful of greedy corporations? Are we going to consume absurd amounts of energy and oil to produce a toxic (PET) by-product that clogs our landfills (the vast majority of it is not recycled). Or are we, as a society, going to marginalize bottled water the same way that we marginalized tobacco, asbestos, lead paint and DDT.
The choice is ours. Boycott bottled water thanks

Didn't see the original post, but did it acknowledge that we don't have such a great record, when it comes to this kind of intereference, specifically in Iran? The CIA orchestrated the coup of Prime Minister Mossadegh in the 1950s and the subsequent consolidation of power by the Shah. Didn't end well -- in fact, there's kind of a straight line between the downfall of Mossadegh and the crappy situation today. So, in addition to your feasibility question, Matt, there's a basic question of efficacy thanks.

The bottled water issue is not going away. I am from the small town of McCloud in far northern california. Nestle, one of the largest multi-nationals on the planet is attempting to hijack our community water supply to enhance their own bottom line.
The bottled water industry has done a phenomenal marketing job.

The bottled water issue is not going away. I am from the small town of McCloud in far northern california. Nestle, one of the largest multi-nationals on the planet is attempting to hijack our community water supply to enhance their own bottom line.
The bottled water industry has done a phenomenal marketing job...

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The issue start if the first call to the phpServices return an error with trigger_error(”clan!!!”);
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If the first call to the server success all subsequent invocations, that return both errors and results. are now performed.

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In an effort to remain dispassionate I stated above that "the U.S. seeks regime change in Iran." Perhaps, to make my comment more accurate, I should add "...and is on the verge of war with Iran."

DISCAIMER: This supplemental language should in no way be construed to suggest U.S. involvement in the above cited incident, nor should it be inferred that the U.S. proximity to war with Iran increases the likelihood of such U.S. involvement.

We actually did have an elite unit of Farsi-speaking ninjas, but they were outed. And then fired.

Curse this new openness! Fifty years ago we would have blackmailed them into being absolutely loyal by threatening to expose their homosexuality. Now we have to fire them!

-fred

your Learn More link is broken, check the code. here's the real link...

http://www.hadibe.net

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I've wondered for a while why people find Glenn Reynolds compelling as a writer, thinker, blogger, pundit. I mean so many other bloggers seems to suck up to him and put him on

And, finally, only the most abject moron would believe that we could just start killing major figures in Turkey "quietly."

Yes, but the lesbians would scare American forces out of Iraq, leaving Anya to rule the whole country with her cash register and an iron fist.

Ah, yes, the Real Genius Val Kilmer solution. Subtle and deadly. I like it. But can we really count on a bureaucratic agency like Nasa to get the Death Ray Satellite launched in time. Maybe we can get Peter Graves to do it from Mission Impossible

Go back a week or two, and you'll see Glenn Reynolds wondering about Putin's "thuggishness" and asking why no one is putting up a fuss over the Litvenko poisoning case.

That's the trouble with us leftists, we just don't know how to have any fun! Man, this stuff is sexy! See, that's why everyone knew that Valerie Plame Wilson was a spy; she's a babe, so you can tell.

Well, after four years, it would be nice if all the other rightwing bloggers would take a

There is some speculation that some assassinations have already taken place, particularly ?

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Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response...

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I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

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Glenn's pretty sure that Chuck Norris speaks Farsi. Problem solved.

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I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily.

I have been hit by the dreaded malware warning and it could not have come at a worse time. My business only started in April, and I don’t think my visitor count had yet been more than ten a day. Nevertheless, visitor numbers were increasing and my Google ranking was improving steadily....

beyond the obvious is how we once again see conservatives (or in Reynolds' case "libertarians") displaying an almost childlike faith in the competence, honesty, and efficacy of the federal bureacracy insofar as that bureacracy is tasked with dishing out lethal force that they would ne

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Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response.

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

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I’m a big fan of both Neil Gaiman and crankgeeks, but this episode did not work for me. The combination of celebrity guest with opinionated, talkative panel members seems tough to pull off. You end up wanting to hear more from each side. And, I defintely agree with previous comments - Dan Farmer was wasted, please have him on again. I loved the questions geared towards the writing process

I’m a big fan of both Neil Gaiman and crankgeeks, but this episode did not work for me. The combination of celebrity guest with opinionated, talkative panel members seems tough to pull off. You end up wanting to hear more from each side. And, I defintely agree with previous comments - Dan Farmer was wasted, please have him on again. I loved the questions geared towards the writing process

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site. Thanks!!

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

Great work ! I really enjoyed browsing through this site. I will recommend it to my friends. Greetings

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Dan Farmer was wasted, please have him on again. I loved the questions geared towards the writing process

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I said to expect those (roughly monthly) updates to become more of a daily thing. That data refresh became more frequent (roughly daily instead of every 3-4 weeks or so) well over a month ago. My best guess is that any changes people are seeing are because that particular data is being refreshed more frequently.

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Thanks for very interesting article. btw. I really enjoyed reading all of your posts. It’s interesting to read ideas, and observations from someone else’s point of view… makes you think more. So please keep up the great work.

Matthew,I love you :)

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Aren't the radical mullahs actually running the Iranian government? I find it hard to see how assassinating a nation's senior public officials can be considered a quiet response

Thanks so very much for taking your time to create this very useful and informative site. I have learned a lot from your site.

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Dan Farmer was wasted, please have him on again. I loved the questions geared towards the writing process

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